Project #1 …. A Work in Progress

 

Frederick Douglas and Tobias Wolff are both enslaved in their respective worlds. While Tobias is not a literal slave as Douglas is, the hardships he endures throughout the course of his childhood make him a figurative slave fighting to have control of his young life. Douglas faces a similar, yet more complicated battle to gain his freedom from a life bound to slavery. Through the course of both autobiographical texts, Douglas and Wolff struggle to gain the freedom they so desperately yearn for.

Tobias Wolff is enslaved partly due to his age and his mother’s tumultuous relationships. While it is true that most children do not have control of their lives due to a parental figure , Toby’s life is further complicated by his mother’s presence. Through her relationships with essentially abusive men, first with Roy and then with Dwight, she puts her son in less than ideal situations. Throughout the course of Toby’s young life his basic freedoms are stripped from him. In Toby’s autobiographical text he demonstrates the way in which he sought freedom from a world he hates; by creating an alternate reality. Toby is constantly making up tales and telling lies to gain freedom from the life he leads. He creates an image of the person he wants to be by developing a unrealistic world, that he does not actually live in. Toby creates a idealistic persona of himself when he writes to his pen pal, the Mickey Mouse club member, and his brother. Toby and his friend Arthur make up stories about where their families’ lineage is descended from. Because Toby feels he does not have control over his life, he simply creates the life he wishes he had. While Toby is seeking freedom from his world through lies he does not take the one real opportunity he has at freedom. Going to Paris would have been the ultimate freedom for Toby, instead he rejects the chance to go and merely continues to be enslaved in Dwight’s world. It seems that when given an opportunity for tangible freedom, Toby is too scared to leave his world behind.

Toby is ultimately rewarded for the creation of a false reality, when he is admitted to The Hill School. Toby creates a person that does not exist, but in the eyes of Hill it is a student that they are edgar to have attend their school. Hill would also be another chance for Toby to be free from the restraints of Dwight, however he has gotten to attend the school under false pretenses, which only makes him a slave to his lies.

Unlike Toby, Douglas is an actual slave, and will be bound to this position for life. Douglas expresses his autobiographical freedom through the style in which he constructs his slave narrative and his actual freedom from slavery. Without his innate intelligence and literacy, Douglas would have never gained freedom from his life bound to slavery. By becoming literate Douglas becomes hyper aware of his situation and the unjust life he is bound to. While it is the first step in his freedom, learning to read also makes Douglas despondent over his situation. However it is ultimately his literacy that allows him his autobiographical freedom.

In his autobiographical text, Douglas has control over his readers, thus fostering the sense of freedom he feels as both an author and a person. As a slave narrative, his audience is expecting a grandiose tale about his escape; however the reader is not given that. Instead Douglas expresses his freedom and decides not to give explicit details on his escape. Furthermore, his text is uncharacteristic for this time period, because of his status as a former slave. Douglas is putting his life in jeopardy, as he is an escaped and literate slave, both illegal entities at the time. This can be seen as an expression of his freedom.

Further complicating Douglas’ freedom from slavery is the lack of relief he feels after his escape. Instead of jubilation for his freedom, Douglas finds that the way of life is not much different in the North. He is at risk for capture, and must continue to tread lightly even as his autobiography gains popularity.

In conclusion, both Wolff and Douglas share similar expressions of their freedom, both in the construction of their texts and their lifestyles. While their lives may feel completely opposite there are similarities that can be drawn through their expressions of autobiographical freedom.

 

Freedom

A Boy of Deception

Tobias Wolff is a boy of deception. Through his entire boyhood he has been deceiving himself and others through tales and creations of a person he is not.

Toby’s scheme to get into The Hill School is the climax of his creation of a falsified reality. While he writes his teacher’s recommendations, his personal essay, and fills out a fake transcript, Toby is substantiating the life he has always wished for. He creates such a strong identity for himself, it is my believe that he begins to believe this as his truth. He is calculated about the lies he tells about his academic and extra curricular achievements. He does not credit himself with achievements that he believes are not possible. Instead he creates a an identity for himself that he believes to be possible if he had better luck in his life. This element makes me feel that Toby is a lazy visionary. While he has a great vision for what his life could be, he does not apply himself to the hard work it would take to get him that lifestyle. Mostly, I feel that Toby is terribly insecure and envious of the upper class. I wonder at what point in Toby’s life he decided that he was going to take hold of his life and accept who he was. This surely occurred after his “wild-man” days and somewhere in the trenches of Vietnam.

“Then I went into the army. I did so with a sense of relief and homecoming. It was good to find myself back in the clear life of uniforms and ranks and weapons. It seemed to me when I got there that this was where I had been going all along, and where I might still redeem myself. All I needed was a war”

The conclusion of This Boy’s Life is brief and vague. To me, Toby’s conclusion was reminiscent of the movie “Stand By Me”. Similar to This Boy’s Life, “Stand By Me” ends with little fanfare. The story simply ends and the boys’ later years are summarized through text. While this type of conclusion may leave the reader disappointed, I feel it is appropriate as this was only a autobiography f Toby’s childhood. Toby tells of time at Hill and gives the reader little detail about what occurred after his dismissal.

A passage that really struck me towards the end of the book was when Toby’s mother was strangled by Dwight. Toby explains how he listen to the struggle in the hallway and credited the strange noises to cats. Then after Dwight is caught by police and standing in cuffs, Toby writes this,

“ Bastard”, I said, but I said it almost gently, conscious of the falseness of my position. I had known someone was in trouble and I had done nothing”.

This phrase “ I had know someone was in trouble and I had done nothing”, really strikes me, as I feel it is symbolic of Toby’s inner struggles. He always knew he was doing the wrong thing and was immoral person, but instead of turing his bad behavior around he did nothing. He simply kept creating a life full of lies.

This Boy’s Life

At this point in Wolffe’s life, he has witnessed the demise of two of his mother’s tumultuous relationships , and is now riding the upswing of a new relationship. Due to his mother’s instability, Toby has been forced to grow up too fast. He is both her son and her confidant. However, Toby’s childlike innocence shines through in many aspects. When Toby’s mother briefly becomes involved with a wealthy man, Toby has a chance to acquire a much sought after bike. When his mother returns home from her date crying, Toby is once again his mother’s comforter. As he acts as an adult, soothing her through her pain, the child side of Toby asks about his promised bike. As Toby delivers papers, day in and day out, he believes that Dwight is saving the money for him. His casual trust is what you would expect of a young boy, not of wise and experienced boy such as Toby. When Toby and his friends watch the Mickey Mouse club, they discuss their admiration and sexual desire for one of the club members. However as the show is under way Toby and his friends are enthralled by the childish musing of the show. One of his friends even sucks his thumb during the episode, something they all pretend not to notice. It is through these experiences that the reader is able to see through Toby’s mature exterior and see the child he really is.

Wolfe is constantly creating a new persona for himself. It seems the creation of Toby’s factious realities are a coping mechanism for the chaotic life he has lived. His identity transformation is evidenced by his name change and various factious details he includes in the letters to his pen pals. While Toby’s identity seeking behavior is normal for an adolescent it seems that is exacerbated by the pressure he has felt to grow up. He is constantly scheming ways to escape his world. However when he gets close he in unable to follow through.

Both Toby and his friends are image obsessed. Toby and his friends attempt to project a cool and mature image through their style of dress and cigarette smoking. After Toby leaves the house and is out of his mother’s sight, he rearranges his clothes and combs his hair, creating a style his mother disapproves of. Toby’s obsession with image and the opinions of others is also evidenced through his friendship with Arthur. Arthur is introduced to the reader as the most uncool boy in the sixth grade. While Toby goes along with the other students, making fun of Arthur, he also acknowledges that Arthur is someone he would like to be friends with. Toby and Arthur do become close friends but not before their infamous fight. It seems that Toby finds a safe haven within his friendship with Arthur because of Arthur’s unpopularity. He has power over Arthur, something he strives for throughout the course of his life.

Toby tells the story of his boyhood as if it was a novel. Unlike many autobiographical texts, Toby does not look back on his life. As he tells the stories of his boyhood, he does not reflect with the wisdom of an adult, or speak of things he learned through his experiences. He merely tells the stories the way they were when he was experiencing them. This is certainly an element of writing I would want to emulate in a personal autobiographical chapter. I notice that through the brief experiences I have had writing autobiographical texts, I always write them from my current point of view. I would like to try and learn to write as Wolfe does and tell the stories from the mindset of the age I was when they were occurring.

Lastly, one of the elements of Toby’s story that made me wonder the most was a comment Toby’s mother made. As they were packing up and leaving Roy, Toby packs up his beloved gun. Toby’s mother insists they have no room for it. As Toby pesters her, she says that “ she is done with guns”. However this is not the case. Guns are constantly present in both Toby and his mother’s lives. Furthermore it is revealed that Toby’s mother is a member of a gun club. She is a skilled shooter and wins competitions. This element is definitely something I would like to further speculate and explore.

 

 

 

 

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